dimanche 12 mai 2013

Peace comes from within. Do not seek it without.

I've talked about God in a previous post regarding happiness, and I can't talk about happiness without mentioning buddhism. I've said it before, I don't believe in dogma, and the relation I have with God is pretty intense yet personal; I have a very strong affection for Jesus, and I can't help but find many similarities between Him&Buddha. In fact, before meeting God around the age of 16, I had for about two years already  started reading a lot about buddhism and hinduism. You could say I met Buddha, Shiva, Brahma and Vishnu before Jesus.

I used to meditate a lot, and do yoga almost everyday for two years, and I suddenly quit for some (still) unknown reason. This had brought me a lot of peace, and I actually remember feeling very at peace at that time, which is, well, quite different from now.

If there are some buddhist concepts I don't entirely agree with, one of them has, however greatly changed my life. I'm still holding onto this important notion, every single day, to remain positive and happy, to face the difficulties that we all have to deal with during our lifetime.

Suffering comes from desire. If I were to be really exact and true to Buddha's words, I should say, suffering comes from desire and attachment. But that's one of the things I'm not 100% agreeing with. Therefore let's stick to desire only(which is already quite a lot to deal with).

There are so many things we long for, want to possess, obtain and just own, so many of our efforts and choices aiming at that sole goal. We put happiness in front of us, always a few clothes, cars, houses, coins ahead of us, somehow convinced that we'll be granted happiness the more goods we can accumulate.

We aspire to look a certain way, never satisfied with our looks, our appearance, our weight, our hair you name it, spending so much of our time focusing on this shell that our body is, but forgetting to treat it well and respect it. We do the same with people. Getting jealous, upset, possessive because we can't accept the fact that no one owe us anything but respect, and that people aren't ours. We grieve and worry too much, for we see others as foreign beings we expect a lot from.

I longued for the love&affection of people who couldn't care less, I cried over my face and body, I expected a lot from friends who already gave me a lot, by just being my friends, and that resulted in me feeling really sad, lonely and somehow angry. I never really felt jealousy nor envy, never upset myself over having more money or more goods, but I definitely felt unhappy because I had too much expectations&desire, and I sure am not the only one.

So what do we do?

Stop wanting, suppress that desire, free yourself from this desire that burns you. Dream, get inspired and inspire, hope for a lot and work hard, but let go of this desire that won't lead you anywhere. Let go.

How can I do that? What would my life be without desire? What would I do everyday if I don't have something to fight for? How am I supposed to behave towards&around people?
These are questions that may come to your mind, and it's crucial to adress them properly, in order to stay away from the misconception that buddhism would be a kind of nihiism.

Bound without clinging to people, bound and love without expecting anything back. Live your life, driven by the power of love, not by the desire to acquire desirable and pleasant things. Be grateful for what you've been given by life, and think of ways to improve yourself, to be a better person rather than how you could improve your material comfort, or the praise/attention you receive from people.

No matter how much you earn, how many material things you can get, you'll never be satisfied. No matter how much someone says he or she loves you, and no matter how much he or she shows and proves this love to you, the fear of this love ending, of your other significant falling for someone else, or lying to you or cheating on you will always be here. If you cling onto this person, you'll never be able to realize that this won't last forever, because nothing last forever, and you'll get hurt. You won't realize it's no point expecting so much from someone, expecting always more because we're already, as human beings all connected to one another. This gap you feel between you and other people is an illusion, that sure may feel very real and may cause you to feel very lonely, but focusing on this connection between all living things make it look a bit ridiculous. 
When there's such a deep, spiritual, natural and simple connection, bound between all of us, hurting because of words we didn't hear, or attention we haven't been given seems really useless&silly.

To put it simply, there's you and the object of your desire. This situation makes you unhappy&sad, causes you a lot of suffering and harmful emotions. If you eventually manage to obtain this object, soon you'll fancy and desire something else. It's quite obvious that getting what you wanted isn't the solution.

There's only one thing between you, and the object of your desire. This is this one thing you must get rid of in order to end your suffering. That is desire itself.

It's not an easy thing, it may be easier for some people, it may be more difficult depending on what you desire the most. But I can tell you from my own experience, that it is an amazing feeling that to love without expecting, to go through life without envying, to wake up every morning with gratitude, and to hope for things within you, or that will make you feel good, and make others feel good.

Just like I felt like I had to share with you about my relationship with God, I think this point (among many others) of buddhism is a really precious lesson we've been given by Buddha, and I really wanted to share it with you. 

Hopefully this was a bit interesting to some of you, let me know what you think about it! :)
Are you familiar with buddhism, are you interested in it? 

10 commentaires:

  1. I'm not very familiar with Buddhism other than quotes from Buddha and the Dalai Lama. I've tried meditation several times over the years and have never been successful at it, although I'm hopeful that one day I'll be able to do it regularly. I do agree that desire for objects leads to suffering. I've been feeling this way a lot lately and have generally become disgusted with the materialism in society today. I'm guilty of it too. Yes, love is the solution to everything :-)

  2. Emy, what a FANTASTIC post! I swear to you I cried at the very end. I'm just starting to read about buddhism, I'm quite interested in it and I would love to read more about it here.

  3. That was a wonderful post! I really enjoyed it :)
    Nice to read a post by someone so like minded...it was crazy how much of what you said I was able to personally relate to. Keep it up lovely lady!
    Pardon me while I go meditate :)


  4. I beg to differ with you on your drawing a parallel between Christ and Buddha. I did a comparative study and the following is my humble understanding thenceforth: there're innumerable superficial similarities (which can really be misleading, especially for those who lack a strong grip on the fundamentals)yet distinctly different and contradictory to each other.

    Buddhism does not have a formal doctrine about the afterlife. And there is no single consensus about whether Buddha (a refiner of Indian beliefs) was a divine figure or just a smart Nepali prince, who lived and died about 2,500 years ago in Asia. Although some individual schools might have strong opinions on this question, Buddhism as a whole does not.

    On the other hand, Christ (He has divine attributes)is the door to afterlife.

  5. You said, "I have a very strong affection for Jesus". Did you say that without knowing His attributes?

    You can't love LIFE and ABORTION simultaneously.

  6. Out of curiosity, have you read any Thomas Merton? If not, you really should check one of his books out.

  7. So glad I found this blog and the French lessons on You tube! Hope I have time to check it and learn basic French language. I am homebound also because I don't drive. Sarah

  8. have you watched this http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8vj0qKthCgg
    I can't fathom how there are so many people who don't believe in God after so many evidences. If atheists are suppose to be rational their are fighting against themselves because the very belief in God is far more rational than believing in nothing at all. If you start to look closely and study the universe carefully, it will force you to believe in Him. I just feel so bad for atheists.

  9. You are gorgeous! You, unhappy with your appearance? I'm shocked because you're so pretty. I have always been unhappy with my appearance too because I am genuinely fat and ugly and have been told so. I had always heard to be accepting of one's appearance. I always thought, well that's easy to say if you are beautiful! Now I see that even if I were beautiful there would still be something I was unhappy about. Putting aside yearnings for beauty and frustration for being ugly is the right thing to do. Only it still hurts when I am rebuffed for being ugly or when I am called fat or can't fit in chairs, something that does not happen to actually beautiful people who don't think they're beautiful.

  10. Interesting. I'm current;y writing a novel and part of it is about the relationship between Christ and Buddha (among other notable historical figures). But I think my views on the relationship is probably different from yours. To me they both show what really matters in this world. I would need several more pages to express what I mean but suffice it to say that I think there are deep similarities.