Today I thought I would do a post about girls. Or more about what it is like being a girl. To me, of course, as I don't hold any universal truth. I can't cover what it is like being a girl completely obviously, but there are few things I've been thinking of lately, and my sister keeps telling me I'm a frustrated feminist( which I disagree with), and I thought it'd be interesting to know what are your thoughts on it guys :)
First of all, I love men. Don't get me wrong, I have nothing against males in general, I get on well with them if not better than with girls, I think they also have to cope with many unpleasant and troublesome things in life, BUT let's be honest, not as much as we, women, do.
As a girl( I'm still not comfortable with calling myself a woman, peterpan's syndrome you say?), I feel like I'm going through abnormal things everyday. By that I mean things that shouldn't be accepted or seen as common, when it has sadly become the case.
The more our society becomes violent and unrespectful towards everyone, and therefore women, the more we push the limits of what is considered rude, violent or innapropriate.
When a guy goes out, what happens ? Pretty much nothing unusual.
When a girl does, however, it's a complete different story. Once again that can differ depending on where you live, but usually she'll be stared at, chatted up, maybe followed or even touched.
From the you're charming, you look ravishing, hey you're good loocking, to the famous what's your number? what's your name, where do you live, how old are you, and the can i take you back home? interested in having a little something with me? ... the possibilities are, halas, almost infinite.
You learn quickly that wearing lipstick will cause insiting looks in best cases, that skirts and heels are apparently like walking naked for some men, and that smiling to a stranger is an invitation to sex.
Words are fine, or are they really? They aren't fine if you think about it, it is not fine to have to deal with that when you did nothing to deserve it, or cause it. Words don't physically hurt, but they are tiring, they are harmful and you actually never know if this guy, this fishy disgusting idiot is only going to talk to you.
There was a time words like these were just out of question, and there are still countries in which that kind of behavior is probably surprising and uncredible. But it has now become normal, ok... Girls themselves, myself first sometimes, say it : " it's just words, no big deal!"
But the line of what is acceptable keep going further and further, and then what?
Touching your shoulder, kissing your hand or cheeks, touching your butt or just leaning onto you in the subway? Will that be fine one day?
Probably like most of girls living in big cities in the western world, I've encountered situations in which I felt annoyed, embarassed or scared. I've had boys putting their hands underneath my skirt, touching my arms or even waist, being rude to me once i asked them to leave me alone. I've heard pretty obscene words and sometimes I've felt really scared.
The only reason to that is my gender. I don't think boys can understand how infuriating it is to feel that weak and defenceless when you're confronted to someone that clearly lacks respect, intelligence and you just wish you could make them feel the way you feel when they treat you like a piece of meat.
Because that is exactly how I feel, and I guess most girls feel. The looks you feel can make your clothes disappear and the words can feel like daring hands.
I may be too sensitive, or my sister may be right, and I'm just a frustrated feminist that takes things too seriously, but I sometimes wish I were a boy, and I sometimes don't want to wear a dress or false eyelashes. And sometimes I get anxious when I'm out at night&alone in the subway.
The same thing happens on YouTube as well. Obscene, sexist, insulting comments aren't unusual.
The reason for it being you're a female, no matter what you do or say, there will always be people who think they have the right to look down on you, on your thoughts,feelings, ideas and opinions and will feel like they are in their right, when they ask you for sex or say something about your breast.
I don't get mad often, but that really pisses me off, and when I keep looking down hoping for that guy to stop talking to me, or when I just pretend I didn't hear these boys I passed by whistling at me like you would at dogs, I feel this cold anger deep inside.
And I guess I just needed to write it down today, just because sometimes it's good to rant right?
Sorry for this boring, unpleasant and pictureless post. I just needed to get that out, and next post will be much more entertaining, I promise!